That’s How This Man Sees It With Gary McCoy – The LSU Fan

Hi, my name is Gary and I’m an addict.  I’ve had this problem since about 1979 but it’s really gotten worse over the last 20 years.  I am an LSUFOOTBALLAHOLIC and I’m betting it’s terminal.  See, I got bit by the LSU football bug a long time ago and there’s really no cure.  I’m pretty sure that even if there was, I don’t want to kick the habit.  Now, I’m not as bad as some of my buddies, who would go so far as to have the game on in the delivery room WHILE their wife is rythmically breathing and pushing to introduce a new Tiger fan to all the purple and gold clad family members ganged up around another big screen in the waiting area.  I even have one buddy who’s last name is Underwood.  He actually named his daughter Lisa Suzanne.  If you can’t figure what her initials are, you might be an Alabama graduate.  Speaking of Alabama.  You know what you do when an Alabama graduate knocks on your door?  You pay him for the pizza! 

Okay, back to me and this habit.  I have made several concessions in my life so that I wouldn’t miss the game.  You know those years when Halloween falls on a Saturday night and LSU happens to be playing that night too?  Hey, the McCoy boys wear their LSU jerseys as costumes with football helmets for bags and actually trick or treat from the back of my pickup while Daddy Tiger listens to the game on the radio.  We hit a couple of neighborhoods as fast as we can and I try to park in front of houses where I can see the TV through their front window.  Course, the minute their helmets are full, which is usually right about half time, we’re off to someone’s game day party and I get to finish things on a 60 inch plasma.  It’s bad.  I broke a tooth just before the big Alabama game one year and actually super glued it back in to hold me until Monday so I wouldn’t miss out.  My dentist suggested I seek psychiatric help.   I fell out of a deer stand one year the morning of the Tennesse game.  Broke a couple ribs.  Did I go to the hospital and miss the game?  No way.  Took a couple pain pills, parked myself on the couch at the deer camp and enjoyed every minute of it.  Course, the pain pills wore off by the 4^th quarter and since it looked like we had this one in the bag and Les Miles didn’t need me to offer any more long distance defensive suggestions, I caved in and made the longest drive to the emergency room I’ve ever taken.  And we LSU fans have taken tailgating to an entirely new dimension.  Anywhere in Baton Rouge on game day, there’s enough food to feed the starving nations 3 squares daily for the next 20 years.  And I’m talking good food…red beans and rice.  Gumbo.  Jambalaya.  Fried fish or shrimp.  And chili good enough to win any cookoff any day in Texas.  I’m betting that if there was ever an official inventory done on game day, there’s probably 100 billion dollars worth of RV’s and red solo cups within a half mile of Death Valley.  It’s almost like an upscale FEMA park for The Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous.  Okay; rich and famous and really drunk.  Oh, and one more thing if you happen to not bleed purple and gold.  We LSU fans have been accused a time or two of being arrogant.  It’s not true.  We’re just better than you.   Course, that’s just how this man sees it!  Geaux Tigers!