SPD Traffic Division Highlights Common Driving Violations In Shreveport

Have you ever just wanted to pull over and vent about Shreveport drivers? Between the orange cones that seem to be reproducing and the construction projects that feel like they’ve been going on since the 1800s, driving in this city has become a test of our collective sanity.

Lucky for us, the Shreveport Police Department has officially entered the holiday spirit by creating a space for us to just let it all out. Welcome to our very own local version of Festivus.

For those who don't know the Seinfeld lore, Festivus isn't complete without the "Airing of Grievances," and the SPD Traffic Division isn't holding back this year. They took to social media to remind us that while they have a job to do, they see the same nonsense we do every single day. Here is their official list of traffic grievances:

• Red lights are not suggestions. They are very confident instructions.
• The left lane is for passing, not sightseeing.
• Hazard lights do not magically turn illegal parking into legal parking.
• “I was just keeping up with traffic” Sir, you were the traffic.
• The shoulder is not an express lane. Ever.
• Turn your lights on when it rains. Every single time.
• Tailgating won’t make the car in front go faster, but it will lead to an uncomfortable meeting.
• Your phone can wait. The light turned green. Yes… we noticed.
• If the road is blocked, it is blocked for you, too.
• “Ma’am, I have to pee too… please give me your license.” (Trust them—nobody wants that traffic stop to end faster than the officer does.)

All jokes aside, we are grateful for the Shreveport Police Department keeping us safe, especially during the holidays when patience runs thin and the roads are packed. If you have no clue what Festivus is, do yourself a favor and go watch the 1997 Seinfeld episode "The Strike."