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Baseball season has officially begun.  Actually, for the Major League it's been almost a month now, but for Little League, Dixie Baseball, high school softball and baseball and collegiate ball, it's been running along since February, but with high school playoffs now underway, the thought occurred to me that there might be a huge number of people attending games for the first time.

I'm a huge fan of the game. My three sons all played and the oldest played all the way through college, so I consider myself somewhat of an expert. Not of the game itself, but of the food. You can take one look at me and see that I don't say no to a whole lot, but I've determined that baseball food comes in two forms. There's the "this will kill me now" group and the "this is gonna be really painful later" group.

So, to aid you in your baseball experience, especially the eating part, I decided that I'd list the Top 10 Ball Park Foods for you, so that you can avoid the "this will kill me now" group. That's the stuff that won't even allow you to finish the game, so you really need to steer clear of anything not on this list.

  1. Cheeseburger Meal.  The grilled right there at the concession stand double meat Cheeseburger and fries coated with Tony's.  A guaranteed heart attack in a cardboard boat, but man what a way to go.
  2. Chili/Cheese Fries.  No season is complete without a hangover from these bad boys
  3. Foot long chili cheese dog.  And I want enough onions on it that it looks like the concession lady cried more while she was cutting them than she did when Old Yeller died.
  4. Nachos with chili, cheese and extra jalapenos.  In its own sick little way this one covers all the major food groups.
  5. Popcorn.  And it really doesn't matter just how much butter or salt is added.  As long as you can smell it from the concession stand 200 feet away, you feel possessed to get a bag
  6. Peanuts.  And I'm not talking "already shelled" peanuts in a bag.  I want to have the real deal with enough hulls scattered around my feet to make me 6 inches taller when I stand up on them.
  7. Sunflower Seeds.  Is there really any other place that you'd actually order these than at the ballpark?
  8. Chicken Tenders.  Yeah you can get these from any gas station in North America, but until you've gotten them at a ballpark, you've been denied one of the greatest joys of summer
  9. Pickles.  Just like sunflower seeds, have you ever had a pickle outside the ballpark?  No one ever walks into Circle K and just orders a 6 inch long Dill Pickle.  In fact, I'm almost positive that pickles were only made 50 years ago and we're just living off of those one ball season at a time.
  10. Chipped Beef Sandwich. I'm not sure just what part of the cow this meat comes from and it evidently is run through a blender long enough to remove any possible means of potential identification but they add just enough barbecue sauce to it to make this a pallet's dream.  Add fresh oversized buns, a mammoth cup of Coke and a handful of Tums and life suddenly gets a lot easier to handle.

So there they are.  Ten more great reasons to show up day after day watching your little leaguer all the way through your college and pro athlete while they do what they love...and trust me, they LOVE having you there.

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