The Real Cost of Louisiana Deer Hunting According to My Wife

It's that magical time of year here in Northwest Louisiana. Even though the thermometer hasn't gotten the memo yet, it's deer season!

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Kids and veterans are able to hunt right now during their special season through this Friday, October 16, in Louisiana Area 2. Then, on Saturday, October 24, it's Primitive Weapons season, and on October 31, everybody's invited to the party!

This is what I call my "annual divorce." It's because I spend as much time in the woods as possible. But, I'm not doing it for all the "time with the guys."

Heck, no! It's my duty as the "hunter/gatherer" for my family! If you've priced groceries lately, you know that you've got to save, wherever you can. And deer hunters all over know that adding some "free" venison to the freezer helps out a ton. Right?

Workers in a grocery store checkout area — Photo by Adhitya Sibikumar on Unsplash

Well, hit the brakes a little. My wife has done some work on the calculator and the assumption that venison is "free" might be a little far fetched.

It all started within minutes of my wife's return from an all-day shopping trip after picking up the items she needed to fix up some flower beds around our place. And this is where I opened my pie hole and proved just how stupid I am. I began to complain about the cost.

That's when she lit into me like a starving dog on a sausage biscuit. “Well, what about your deer hunting?” she said. My reply was one I thought to be logical. “My deer hunting helps out on the grocery bill”.

She then explained to me how illogical my thinking really was. “Oh, it helps on the grocery bill? Well, let’s do the math on that.”

Your hunting licenses - $200
Your deer lease fees - $1200
Automatic Deer Feeders - $600
Corn for the feeders - $200
The seeds and fertilizer for your food plots - $300
Your 4 deer rifles - $3,000
Ammunition - $200
The new side by side - $10,000
New deer stands - $1,000
Deer processing for 6 deer - $700
Camouflage clothing and boots - $1,500
Gas for back and forth to the camp for the season - $500
Groceries while you’re at the camp - $500

“So, if we get 250 pounds of venison from those 6 deer then we’re averaging nearly $66 a pound! Ribeye steaks are only $25 a pound there big boy."

It was then that I truly proved my ignorance and I said, "$66 a pound huh? Sounds like it's about the same price as those high heels you bought last week."

The doctor says the scar over my left eye is permanent, but the vision should return in a week or two.

10 Things Guys Should NEVER Say at the Deer Camp

There aren't a whole lot of rules for guys at the deer camp, but a man should always remember that his man card is on the line if he slips and says something like these things.

Gallery Credit: Gary McCoy